Ever been here? ^

We've heard it before. The familiar phrases: struggling artist, struggling new business owner, unnoticed blogger, battling against the odds. Someone mentions following an unfamiliar path and immediately the peanut gallery is quick to submit an opinion on why it's not a good idea. There are clearly much safer choices.

Society tends to deter the inspired from following the career path of an artist, actor, writer, creator or somebody who lives their life in an unfamiliar way; by alluding to a life without money, a continuous or never ending struggle, one in a million chances of success or by suggesting we face this apparent reality that we're not special enough - those people are 'lucky.'

"After all, we can't all be artists can we? Who's going to pick up the trash?"

Eventually you start to believe crazy things:
I couldn't possibly work hard for something until it succeeds. Nobody ages, positions of power never shift and there isn't a soul out there that might agree with me. The market is too saturated, there isn't room for me in that industry, those guys are much better than I am. A range of discouraging notions cycle in your head until you've convinced yourself they were right. Everything you've thought, everything you've believed in up until this point, everything you've worked for to attain your dreams was a false reality you've created for yourself. All of this was for nothing.

Time to give up, throw in the towel, you can't get it done. Can't figure out how you want to spend every day of your life? Well you'd better figure it out. There's always just enough money out there to convince you going for it isn't worth a shot.

R E L A X. Turns out nobody has truly mastered this game, we're all just playing; learning new things every day. Following the dream introduces a difficult obstacle course and sometimes your mind can throw you into a spiral. This is a list of 14 lessons I've been taught to remind and motivate (us) to keep struggling to do what we really want to do.


1. What you hear becomes what you believe

The more you tell something to other people, the more you hear yourself say it, the more you will believe it. Be truthful and honest to yourself and others, it will pay off in the long run. "Stop saying why it won't work and focus on why it will."

2. Don't try to be perfect

Perfection is an illusion; people can appreciate you're not perfect. Make your greatest effort at what's important, deliver and move forward. Obsessing over details slows your progress, questioning yourself will leave all your projects 75% completed. Today's headlines are tomorrow's history. Learn from it and keep on moving.

3. Ideas are ideas

Until you've taken the first step, an idea floats around as a temporary projection of something desired. Though simple, writing things down is more substantial than saying "that's a good idea, I should do that."

4. You need to believe it

If you don't believe in what you do, what you're selling or what you're talking about - then what are we talking about?

5. Work smart

Tackle what's most important first, one step at a time. If you're starting to panic, walk away. Go outside. Relax and come back later. This step is not negotiable. Panic causes quick, rash decisions and completely stops your creativity.

6. React appropriately

How you feel determines how you'll feel. Don't get caught up in the moment and make hasty decisions. "Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it." - Unknown

7. There will always be haters

"When you feed people the truth, you don't know how they're going to react ... Be patient, for now." - Nas
8. Take Risks

9. Trust Yourself

"People don't buy what you do, they buy why you do it." - Simon Sinek

10. Enjoy it

Take a deep breath and gaze from time to time. Somehow gain pleasure from what you do or it's not worth doing.

11. There is a time for everything

Time to relax, time to hustle, time to work, time to laugh, time to cry. Focus on each while you're in it, embrace it; but realize everything happens in waves and vibrations; nothing ever stops moving.

12. Never give up, keep trying

If you enjoy the time you spend, you're not spending time at all.

"Again, you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life."
Steve Jobs

Alright, lets pretend Marshall Mathers never picked up a pen
Lets pretend things would have been no different
Pretend he procrastinated, had no motivation
Pretend he just made excuses that were so paper thin, they could blow away with the wind
Marshall you’re never gonna make it, makes no sense to play the game there ain’t no way that you’ll win
Pretend he just stayed outside all day and played with his friends
Pretend he even had a friend to say was his friend
Eminem – Airplanes Pt. 2

13. Passion will drive you keep trying

If you're in it for the wrong reasons, frustration will eventually drive you to give up. Otherwise, it will only motivate you to keep trying harder. To find the right way, you'll first discover seemingly countless wrong ways. If you haven't yet succeeded to where you believe is appropriate, you haven't yet exhausted every possible option - there is always a better way of doing everything.

- Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.
- I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.
- There is always a better way.
- We don't know a millionth of one percent about anything.
Thomas Edison

14. Pursue Happiness

Really the goal in life is happiness. The answer to life is be happy with what you have. I asked my 88 year old Grandfather what is the most important thing in life. Without hesitation, "your health." How you feel affects everything you do, understand yourself. Live, Love and Prosper!

Growing up I was lucky to have the opportunity to build strong relationships with people without the risk of having them stolen away. Being in the same neighborhood and school system from kindergarten to high school graduation gives you plenty of time to really know and understand the people in your life, as well as recognize who your real friends are.

I found myself face to face with how quickly life moves at the wedding of a preschool chum, 16 years after we'd first played in the sandbox together. Kids I'd known since Elementary School sat across the table and around the room now as adults in classy attire, all so much different yet so much the same. As far apart as we have been and can be, we all grew up together and are a part of each other despite what we become. There was a nostalgia in the room that day, but also an optimistic recognition of the journey ahead. Events like a friend's wedding used to seem so far off, now here it was playing out in front of me as if another scene in the movie of real life.

Knowing the people around you and being ingrained in a community is a comforting and easy going feeling. Living surrounded by people you know and love gives you a sense of safety that tends to make life this cushy bubble you just bounce around in. You build your reputation and carry it around with you, its not one of those living situations where the people you converse with today might never be seen again. You build integrity, value and trust with one another, thus creating relationships that support you when things aren't going smoothly. You become accountable to the community and your place in it, everybody has connections to everybody in one way or the other.

Seeing people you know around town becomes part of the routine. Eventually, you can forget how you're interacting with the people in your life and simply assume the role of "you." You embody what you've imagined yourself to be in this particular environment and that's how you approach every situation. Eventually you do things that "you would do" instead of challenging yourself to take a different route. It's not that you're changing yourself, but perhaps instead you aren't allowing yourself to be changed. Plainly enough, when you're not forced to reevaluate parts of your life, you don't. If it's not broken, why fix it? I learned that once its broken you might find a better way of putting it back together. Change causes growth and growth gives you power, but you can only grow with first the desire to change.

The challenge of something unfamiliar is what keeps living interesting. Taking a risk in life even to avoid saying "what if?" somewhere down the line becomes an acceptable approach. I can safely say theres too much to know in a lifetime; instead of trying to conquer it all, we must choose the path most intriguing to us.

As these strikingly real events like children, marriage, travel, career, relocation and unmistakable growth began to surface amongst my peers, it became clear it was time for a challenge. If failure is a prerequisite to success then nothing is lost in any attempt. Getting to where you want to be in life becomes less of a dream and more of a question of how long you're willing to work to get there. It all comes back to a simple risk, are you willing to try what you don't know you can do for sure? I soon learned not knowing what you'll create for yourself next is the most compelling aspect of the journey.

One day I decided to challenge myself to do something I wasn't so sure I could pull off. I left everything familiar to me behind, packed everything I could fit in my car and moved 1300 miles to Florida without a plan. As it turns out, making an attempt at something you're unsure of is really empowering. Even making the decision to challenge myself immediately opened my mind to all the possibilities a new environment has to offer. Its weird how your entire perspective can change while you sit in the same place; you could imagine how it changes when you're moving.

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power." - Alan Cohen

"The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind." - Wayne Dyer

"Don't say you can't, say 'I presently struggle with.'" - Tony Horton